Beyond The Pain

2014 was a difficult year for me. I had approximately 3 months of relief from the pain of Rheumatoid Arthritis. In September I believe, the pain returned and I haven’t had a day of remission since, until now. It’s a steroid induced remission but hey I’ll take it. I found out a few things about myself along this journey. Some I don’t like. Some not so bad. I have a love/hate relationship with the Mississippi Delta. This place bring me pain and suffering, much like RA (Rheumatoid Arthritis) I can’t escape either one. (at the moment) They both bring me anguish! They test my sanity and how far I’m willing to go in the name of Obedience to the One that I love. They make me want to shake my fist and stamp my feet and scream. Sometimes I do all of that. Other times I just cry from the pain of it all.

I believe that my last prayer before my appointment with Dr George on Thursday was “Lord you have to do something. I need a break from the pain. I’m on the edge of no control. I’ve started to believe that there is no hope. help me please.” When I got to Doc’s office all I expected was a refill on the blood pressure medication and a regular check up. However, before all of that he wanted to know how he could help me get some relief. (finally a glimmer of hope} So here I am 4 Decadrons later and I feel better than I’ve felt in 5 months. God is good. Not only that He is getting me in to see the Rheumatologist at UMC. God opened the door. I read that email from my friend Care Newhoff: Max Lucado, from his book: Max On Life. “God heals. not a prayer. A matter of semantics, No. If you think the power is in the prayer and not the One who hears the prayer, you fault the pray-er for unanswered prayer. “if I had prayed more, better, differently…” The power of prayer is in the One who hears it, not the one who makes it. please don’t interpret the presence of your disease as the absence of God’s love. I pray He heals you. And He will ultimately. Till then, keep praying.

When I read that I saw me. How I’ve been feeling, thinking and even sharing with God. That message got me back on track. In the right direction. The lack of noise from the pain has helped me to Hear God’s voice clearly once again. He is good. As for my love/hate relationship with the Delta? Well He brought me a helper, my daughter Amber. She lives with us now. She’s a great help to me. He is good. I found that after the noise of the pain left? I don’t dislike her(the Delta) so much. Also, thanks to Patricia King I found my verse.

Psalm 18:1-2 I will love thee, O Lord, my strength.
2 The Lord is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer, my God, my strength, in whom I will trust, my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower.

Father,

You are also the God of the Mississippi Delta. We love thee, O Lord, our strength! Thank you Lord for your trust in Delta Force to pray Your will in the Delta. Thank you Lord for reminding me of who I am and why I am here. Thank you Lord for carrying me and all the people of the Delta who hurt too much to hear you clearly. Lord give them relief and release. They need you. We need you. Lord thank you for rightful places and right mindsets. Thank you for a land rich and full of your Glory, love, power and authority. Lord you are worthy to be trusted for all things good here and the not so good things you will turn around to produce good. Thank you for the wake up call. In Jesus name. Amen

2 thoughts on “Beyond The Pain

  1. Oh, Lesley! This fills me with joy more than I can say. This morning as I was praying, I saw that hopelessness gives way to apathy. I was also reminded that “Hope deferred makes the heart to stoop, but when desire comes, it is like a tree of life.” I declare your tree of life is budding forth in your new season, in the Name of Jesus. Thank you for sharing this — it is life changing for me and for many.

  2. Lesley! excellent! ‘the noise of the pain’ so touched my heart. Pain is so hard, but you my dear are learning and hearing His voice so that you can help clear the path for others in pain. Thank you for your heart to push through this so that others may follow. Love you and honor you for your courage to continue in the face of adversity. Love you!

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